Diary – August 6, 2011

Dear D,

Living without you is so hard. I regret many things. Looking back I realize much; we both married late and as a result, had so much more bonding time together. Selfish maybe but in retrospect we did not know what was to come.  I had first place in your life (or so I thought). I in turn adored you from the time I was born and first laid eyes on you. I idolized, looked up to and admired you. I used to think you were favoured by everyone, but I realize now that I was  just being selfish. I never wanted to share you with anyone! Why? You were such an amazing person. I thought noone could love and appreciate you they way I did, but I was wrong. Please forgive me for not showing you just how much I loved you, for not telling you everyday and for not showing my appreciation for all that you did: loving me unconditionally, protecting me, encouraging me, telling me the hard truth.

I know you are in a better place now but I miss you so much it hurts. It is still so hard to accept, I wish it was just a dream. But your life has taught me many things; to live life to the fullest, never be afraid of anything, always do my best, love others and to keep God at the forefront. I hope your legacy (son) will always feel your presence in his life, he will have all he needs and know the Lord as you did.